Home Podcast How Grief Affects Your Finances: An Interview with Emily Guy Birken

How Grief Affects Your Finances: An Interview with Emily Guy Birken

by Melanie

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Grief and trauma can disrupt our mental functioning which also affects how we handle our money. And if one is already burdened with debt and then made to suffer from grief it can result in more trauma and financial stress than necessary.

So, the question is, how do you protect yourself mentally and financially in the future? We never know what the future holds. Find out in this episode as Melanie chats with financial expert Emily Guy Birken. Emily is the author of the book “End Financial Stress Now”. She is a former educator, lifelong money nerd, and a Plutus Award-winning freelance writer who specializes in the scientific research behind irrational money behaviors. 

Emily discussed how our brain works to help us cope with grief and trauma. She also shares her story of losing her father and how it affected her finances and the unexpected feelings around getting a life insurance payout.

She talks about an important mindset shift that will help us be compassionate with ourselves, understand why we do this and what it’s doing to us and figure out other ways to help us keep going and get back to our right headspace.

That way we can make better financial decisions and plan for the future. With this Emily shares the importance of having an emergency fund, life insurance, and automating some of your tasks with the help of your family or friends. We can also learn how we can help someone who is suffering from grief or trauma. Emily also points out that we have another great ally to help us get through grief and financial stress, given that we use it correctly – our own money!

“While everything is going well is when you want to provide a protection for yourself in the future.”

– Emily Guy Birken

“If you know someone who is going through a tough time, know that finances are probably on their mind, and so find ways that you can ease that financial burden from the outside .” 

–  Emily Guy Birken

“When you are making money decisions that are not necessarily going to be for your benefit, they’re not bad money decisions, they’re disordered.” 

–  Emily Guy Birken

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Timestamps  

2:10 – What is post-traumatic stress disorder – how our brain protects us from traumatic events and how it affects our financial habits

4:25 – The importance of an emergency fund and ways on how we can truly help people suffering from grief or trauma 

8:38 – Emily’s experience of grief as her father died – feeling the worst “privileged” financial stress and how it changed her outlook on life insurance

11:47 – Trauma and grief as a living process and caring for people who are suffering

13:05 – Having some irrational fears during her pregnancy and how Emily used her father’s life insurance policy

15:43 – What Emily did for her mental and financial well-being while in grief

20:35 – Why we make “bad” money decisions while in grief or trauma, how we should look at it and be compassionate with ourselves

24:25 – Looking at our emotional bank and our emotional needs – what we can do today to make sure tomorrow is easier 

27:05 – Melanie’s experience with grief 

26:30 – Why automate? – what is it and how it can help you protect your financial well-being when you’re depressed and you feel like money doesn’t matter anymore

32:51 – A mindset shift to help you through grief or trauma – making money your ally 

36:04 – The benefits of having a support group and the importance of self-compassion to help you heal

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